The Past is History!
Updated: Oct 30, 2020
I could very easily let all my traumas of the past take control of who I am today. I have suffered a lot and have plenty of ‘life experiences’ that have shaped who I am now and up until this point I have been a victim to them. Over the past few days, weeks, months and even years I have been growing and developing to this point... The point where I say enough is enough, I am taking control, I am my own master.
At some point as my younger self, I thought I knew ‘me’; where I was going, who I was and believed that life was great. Now as I meander through my mid thirties, I am left with a revelation! A victim of child abuse, the bullied kid at school, two failed marriages, two divorces, a victim of emotional and physical domestic abuse, a life long career left in tatters, I have from somewhere gained clarity that all my life has been a focus on negativity, I have lived life as a victim.
For fear of physical and verbal confrontation and having a complete lack of management support, I had resigned from my police officer career after nearly 15 years. The first couple of weeks were pretty much a jolly, no focus, just letting that gust of wind swish me to wherever it wanted to take me.
However, now there is change, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and it starts and ends with me. I know what I need to do, I need to change my point of focus, I need to live life for me, find myself again, leave the negativity in the road behind me and look forward remembering all the amazing positives I have in my life, because there are a lot! :-)